<보이후드>, 매일매일 잘 찍고 싶은 내 인생

 

 

보이후드 Boyhood , 2014

미국 | 드라마 | 2014.10.23 개봉 | 15세이상 관람가 | 165분

감독리처드 링클레이터 | 출연엘라 콜트레인, 패트리샤 아퀘트, 로렐라이 링클레이터, 에단 호크

 

I wish I could use the bumpers...

You don't want the bumpers, life doesn't give you bumpers.

 

Dad, there's no real magic in the world, right?

What do you mean?

You know, like elves and stuff. People just made that up.

Oh, I don't know. I mean, what makes you think that elves are any more magical than something like a whale? You know what I mean? What if I told you a story about how underneath the ocean, there was this giant sea mammal that used sonar and sang songs and it was so big that its heart was the size of a car and you could crawl through the arteries? I mean, you'd think that was pretty magical, right?

 

Top of volume two, first four tracks. You've got "Band on the Run" into "My Sweet Lord" into "Jealous Guy" into "Photograph." Come on! It's like the perfect segue. You've got Paul who takes you to the party, George who talks to you about God, John is just "No, it's about love and pain" and then Ringo who just says "Hey, can't we enjoy what we have while we have it?"

 

You know what I'm realising? My life is just going to go. Like that. This series of milestones. Getting married. Having kids. Getting divorced. The time that we thought you were dyslexic. When I taught you how to ride a bike. Getting divorced... again. Getting my masters degree. Finally getting the job I wanted. Sending Samantha off to college. Sending you off to college. You know what's next? Huh? It's my fucking funeral! Just go, and leave my picture!

Aren't you jumping ahead by, like, 40 years or something?

I just thought there would be more.

 

You know how everyone's always saying seize the moment? I don't know, I'm kinda thinking it's the other way around. You know, like the moment seizes us.

 

 

 

---

마법은 생각보다 더 가까이에 있다. 

인간은 순간을 잡을 수 없지만, 순간은 인간을 사로잡는다.

내 싱거운 인생에도 영혼을 사로잡은 순간들이 있어서 나는 눈앞의 현실보다도 선명한 어느 찰나들을 자꾸만 되돌아본다. 

그 순간순간이 조각보처럼 모여 오늘의 나를 이루고, 나는 또 어떤 한 조각의 순간을 만들기 위해 살아가겠지. 

뭔가 더 있을거라 기대했던, 소란하고 지난했던 삶이 어느날 돌아봤을 때 지극히 평범하고 무난한 모양임을 깨달았을때 흐르는 눈물은 애달픔일까, 안도감일까, 벅찬 감격일까.

그런 눈물을 흘리게 되는 순간에 그 의미를 온전히 헤아릴 수 있을 만큼 견고한 삶을 살아갈 수 있으면 좋겠다. 

 

12년의 세월을 165분으로 응축한 진한 위로와도 같은 영화였다.

우리가 저마다 다르고 또 비슷한 시간을 성장통처럼 견디고 오늘에 이르렀다고 토닥여주는 것 같아 마음이 뜨끈했다. 

엄마랑 같이 보길 잘했다. 다만, 엄마를 꼭 끌어안아주고 싶은 장면들이 있었는데 그러지 못했다는 후회가 남는다. 

 

 

I know every life's a movie
We got different stars and stories
We got different nights and mornings
Our scenarios ain't just boring
나는 이 영화가 너무 재밌어
매일매일 잘 찍고 싶어
난 날 쓰다듬어주고 싶어

- 방탄소년단, Reflection